Eli Hawkedal

Eli Hawkedal died unexpectedly last Saturday night, Mar. 20, 2010
Most of you will have heard by now but I wanted to say a few words about one of our sons.

Eli was one of the fortunate few to who could call Lasqueti their birthplace. He was born in the house which Allan Farrell built and grew up here, partly on Wolf Island partly in Cocktail Cove. Eli was also one of those troubled souls, who lived with his inner demons and used drugs and alcohol to confront them. Those of us who grew up with him, knew him and loved him, those who didn't could not understand our patience and accommodation. Boy what a worker, one of the legendary powerhouses of the Island!

Lasqueti probably wasn't the best place for Eli at various times in his life, as it happens to many of us, sometimes it is just better to "get out of Dodge" This Eli did, and to all accounts he stopped drinking and recovered his life. The last few weeks he had apparently been staying with Cynthia, built her a sun porch and they were having a great time together.

I feel grateful that he was able to find some peace in his life before it ended so unexpectedly. I feel grateful to have had him in my life. He was a big hearted man, as those who are troubled and judged, often are.

with love, Laurence


A Memorial for Eli

The memorial for Eli was held on Saturday in Cedar and at a hall in Nanaimo, the weather cooperated, which was great. It was overwhelming to see all the people who showed up for Eli, Cynthia & Tammy. I think was 50 or more of his own peer group! They were all people he had grown up with. I knew we had spawned a lot, but that was astounding to see you all in the same place at one time!

Cynthia opened by letting everyone how well he was in the weeks before he died. How he came to stay with her built an amazing glass "Sun Temple" of a sun room for her. Cooked gourmet meals for her every night. And served her. Considering her plates too small, and her too skinny, he went out and bought larger plates and proceeded to try and fatten her up. Allen Brown an old friend of the family who has helped Cynthia with various building projects, told how he came to help build the sun room and literally was, Eli's helper.

Some beautiful poetry was read, I read a little bit for Lasqueti, we chanted, a song was sung, perfect.... and Cynthia pushed her son into the furnace and pushed the button to start the fire.

I don't have a copy of the poetry which was read, but here is what I said, really, for Lasqueti.

In Memorium Eli Haukeda


It is not important that life be long, but that it be full.

Though Eli lead a hard life, it was certainly full. Full of the things with make all our lives worth living in the end: excitement, love, confusion, adventure and always suffering.

I think Eli had more than his share of suffering and pain, perhaps this is why he got to get out of school early.

I had few special moments with Eli, though I had many conversations with him, most of them were quite formal. No matter what I had to say, even if it was critical, he was polite and a gentleman, though he never hesitated to defend himself.

When we live our lives as openly as Eli did the community around us, assumes they know us. Eli like all of us had many faces: he was our brother, our son, even our father. When the news first hit and our hearts were breaking, one of the tearful calls Kathy received was from one of Eli's younger friends. Through his tears he said:

"Eli was my friend, we sat and talked together, shared our hearts. No one else knows... what am I going to do...."

Eli and I shared at least one thing in common: We were the first of perhaps three, who climbed the Telus tower. I went up early the morning after it was completed, sat on the top, which was just big enough for my skinny butt, and smoked my pipe.

Sometime later Eli went up - he stood on the top, opened his arms, looked up and embraced the sky!

Go Eli, go!